can
you be your own
wedding planner? by
Kari Newsom
Of
course you can! And to be honest with you, the majority of weddings
don't have a hired, professional wedding planner. As a matter of
fact, I didn't have one - my mother and I did everything for my
wedding and I mean EVERYTHING. The big must is: You need to be able
to handle the 'pressure' of deadlines, questions, errands, contracts
and much more, without caving in and having a nervous breakdown.
It is possible!
First things first you
need to be organized to pull it off. If you're not usually an organized
person you will have to try especially hard to be disciplined in
this area. Start planning as soon as you get engaged. I had almost
a year and a half engagement - but I didn't waste any time and I
needed every minute of it.
Begin by getting a wedding
planner book. There are many good ones out there; I used a Beverly
Clark planner which was laid out in a simple, easy to follow way.
Get things in order. Make lists. They will save you during all this
planning. Make a list of all the people you will need to contact.
A church, ceremony sites, reception sites, photographers, caterers,
travel agents, florists, bakeries, jewelers, officiates, hair salons,
etc. Your first major calls should be for the ceremony site and
the reception site. Most will tell you that you should get those
at least and year in advance - believe them. Places get booked quick.
You can't procrastinate when planning your wedding. Once you have
those two down, all the others will be quite simple. Begin searching
for honeymoon plans. Usually the groom takes care of this. Get in
touch with a travel agent who will do all the work for you and save
you the hassle of paying too much and getting taken for you money.
Usually most travel agents have companies they work with that specialize
in special packages for vacations. Companies such as Sandals, Sun
Trips, etc. Those tend to book up fast, so do that ahead of time.
They will give you a payment schedule which will help you in your
finances and budget for you wedding. They are there to help you
with the perfect honeymoon destination.
Selecting a gown is one of
the most fun parts, but usually doesn't have to be done too far
in advance. Most wait due to style changes, weight gain or loss
and just a plain change in what they like. Get an idea of what you
will want, though, so you can start looking for bridesmaid's gowns
to compliment your own.
Begin
going to different bakeries and sampling their cakes and finding
out all they offer with their services. We ended up going to 3 different
places before we made our final decision. The BEST thing to do is
a find a picture of what you like and give it to your bakery. This
will alleviate the problem of arriving at your reception to see
a cake decorated completely opposite of what you wanted. It has
happened and it almost happened to us. Our baker happened to fax
us a picture (at my request) of what the cake looked like (they
bake them about 3 days in advance). Well, I got the picture and
it was the wrong style and the colors were red and green. My cake
was supposed to be white and ivory, not red and green. I photo copied
a picture right then and there of what I wanted and took it up to
them and my cake turned out beautiful. So, please, give them a picture
and be very specific about what you want and don't want. Colors,
add ons - everything. Don't just think they understand what you
mean. And remember, you are the customer paying them for a product
and service- get it the way you want it and don't feel bad about
being too detailed. You're not being picky - you're being smart!!!
You should also have a calendar
that you look at everyday, so you can write down your important
dates. When money is due on a contract, when you are meeting with
the photographers, when you have to pick up the bridesmaid's dresses
and so on. Being organized with a calendar will you avoid a lot
of stress during your engagement and wedding planning. Another good
thing to get is a multi-pocket 'folder' or file holder. There are
many that you can get that have about 10 pockets and they are small
enough to carry around with you. You can find plastic ones for a
couple dollars at office supply stores. Use this to organize your
receipts and information for all that you have to do. It doesn't
take up much space and you will have everything in one place. You
won't be searching the whole house, under piles of paper trying
to find something you need. You won't regret it.
There is much more advice
that can be given and you can try searching our Message
Boards for what other people have to say about planning
your own wedding. The most important thing is to have fun and enjoy
yourself. Don't get stressed out over the details. If you find that
it's too much for you to handle, ask a family member or friend for
their assistance. Most will be more than happy to help. And when
your big day gets here, all your planning and organizing will pay
off and you will have a day you will never forget!
For
more detailed instructions on particular areas in your wedding,
you may go to our Wedding
Section.